Holy crap I have a new podcast, y’all. It’s called Love Will Tear Us
Apart. Ever since I was a little girl, I’ve been captivated by dramatic
love stori...
Showing posts with label sexy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sexy. Show all posts
Sex with J.Love
A couple of weeks ago I was out at a bar, minding my own business, tossing extra beers down my throat when my friends were outside, and generally just gettin' my ~drunk~ on. Now, if I'm to the point of sneaking beers, I'm probably going to talk to strangers. And thank Buddha I did, because I got a column question out of it.
If I put a remote control up my girlfriend's vagina, can I still use it to control the television?
BarDude, I hate your need to reiterate your association to Soundgarden. However I'll suspend judgment because this is one of the most legitimately ridiculous questions I've ever fucking heard.
No, your remote control will not work inside your girlfriend's vagina. Not if it's an infrared remote, which it probably is. Consult this HowStuffWorks.com article if you really want to understand why you can't pump a clicker in and out of the HolyHole while flipping between 30 Rock and True Blood. Essentially, the little light on the front of your remote is actually sending signals to the television, so when you block it's path of transmission with something like a uterus, it can't do it's job. You can't turn a laser pen on inside a vagina and expect it to light up the STS9 show either, y'know? Similar concept.
Now, let me explain why I extra-hate you. Did it ever occur to you to just hold your hand in front of the remote and attempt to get it to work? Try that. Right now.
Exactly.
The better question would have been: HOW can I get the remote to work while in my girlfriend's vagina?
A: Have your girlfriend sit on your lap and relax the back of her body onto the front of yours. Insert the remote control into her grouch of a gap backwards (so that the LED light is still visible), and then take it from there.
If I put a remote control up my girlfriend's vagina, can I still use it to control the television?
BarDude, I hate your need to reiterate your association to Soundgarden. However I'll suspend judgment because this is one of the most legitimately ridiculous questions I've ever fucking heard.No, your remote control will not work inside your girlfriend's vagina. Not if it's an infrared remote, which it probably is. Consult this HowStuffWorks.com article if you really want to understand why you can't pump a clicker in and out of the HolyHole while flipping between 30 Rock and True Blood. Essentially, the little light on the front of your remote is actually sending signals to the television, so when you block it's path of transmission with something like a uterus, it can't do it's job. You can't turn a laser pen on inside a vagina and expect it to light up the STS9 show either, y'know? Similar concept.
Now, let me explain why I extra-hate you. Did it ever occur to you to just hold your hand in front of the remote and attempt to get it to work? Try that. Right now.
Exactly.
The better question would have been: HOW can I get the remote to work while in my girlfriend's vagina?
A: Have your girlfriend sit on your lap and relax the back of her body onto the front of yours. Insert the remote control into her grouch of a gap backwards (so that the LED light is still visible), and then take it from there.
Sexy Beingway2awesome.com Sexy 2010 Calendar
Hey everyone I just wanted to get some feedback and nominations for the Sexy Beingway2awesome.com Sexy 2010 Calendar.
I need to have the sexy calendar photo shoot set up by the end of this month. We currently have a handful of initial commitments including the young lady below who has signed up for October. I think everyone will like our ideas for this month!
What I need are approximately 5-7 more beautiful young ladies willing to participate in a sexy calendar. Each month will have a theme and I am leaving the choices up to the girl. Well......the girl and her representation, of course.
Ladies, this is definitely the chance for you to be hot as shit and sexier than everyone else. Don't let me down.
Guys, let's get some applications going accompanied by a picture.
Shanda is fucking in!
